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Table of contents:-
- 08:02 AWOKE/OR, RATHER WAS AWOKEN BY A 'BAD' DREAM...!
- 12:00 NOON COOKED TUNA AND RICE
- 13:00 WAS WATCHING A GAME OF PROFESSIONAL POKER BEING PLAYED ONLINE: POKERSTARSUK
- 14:00 DID SOME FACEBOOK IM/INSTANT MESSAGE CHATTING...INSIDE OF BOTH: THE ASPERGER'S ROOM/THE GAMBLING ROOM
- 15:00 JOINED IN WITH A GA/GAMBLER'S ANONYMOUS MEETING ONLINE (WHICH WAS BEING HELD IN AMERICA)
- 22:30 THOUGHT ABOUT GOING OUT TO BUY MYSELF SOME CHICKEN & FRIES...; BUT, LEFT IT FAR TOO 'LATE'
- 23:08 PLAYED WILLIAM HILL FREE GAMES/5 FREE SPINS (EMAIL)/WON: 10P!
- 23:20 VISITED: FINDAJOB.GOV.UK WEB SITE...TO COMPLETE DOING DAILY JOB SEARCH
- 23:30 VISITED MICROSOFT REWARDS WEB SITE: REWARDS.MICROSOFT.COM...IN ORDER TO ACCUMULATE SOME MORE POINTS...SO, I CAN GET FREE VOUCHERS TO USE INSIDE OF SHOPS
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- 08:02 AWOKE/OR, RATHER WAS AWOKEN BY A 'BAD' DREAM...!
I awoke very early this morning...due to having experienced a 'bad' dream.
I had a first cousin called, Andrew...who was 2/3 years younger than me...even, as younger kids, we both tended to get on really well with one another...almost regarding ourselves as being brothers(we had no other brothers); and, who died in a motor cycle accident...he was 'speeding'...or, so, the police claimed...which was something he really 'loved' to do; and, he crashed into a car(I believe the car passenger's got hurt, too).
Well, unfortunately, just before he died we had a bit of a falling out with one another...; and, therefore, we were no longer on speaking terms, anymore.
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In my dream, I find myself practicing doing some skipping...something I've tried doing a lot more, recently; only in a very highly unfamiliar place/area...where I do not remember having ever been before...???
Next, thing I know...quite suddenly, straight from out of nowhere...a suited guy came and approached me -(if he saw me walking in the street...he would, usually, stop...when he was driving his car)- I can't recall in the dream if they, actually, said 'hello' or not...but, they did take hold of me. Quite clearly, I slowly began to recognize who that face was...it was my dearly departed cousin, Andrew. He looked rather 'younger', though...than I do remember when seeing him last.
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What's weird about that dream is...
-1, Apart from having gone and attended the actual funeral itself, I have never visited his grave. (Though, when I was in the area where I believe he is buried...I did try looking around to see if I could find it...but, no, I did not...?!)
- Number 2, a deeply perturbed mind is much more likely to get 'bad' dreams; than is a mind that is happy, peaceful, calm. My mind is very highly perturbed, at the moment.
- Financial problems (I am 'fast' running out of all money to be able to pay for bills/and, also, run the house...which is a ever constant worry on my mind...I worry about that all the time...where on earth am I going to get money from...? When my closest family: mum/aunt were still alive...; then, I had somebody to turn to for financial help and support...; but, with them both being dead...I, now, have absolutely no one to turn to for help...?!)
- Family estrangement (I don't actually speak to Andrew's sister, anymore/nor do I speak to his over-domineering, and, bad tempered uncle, Gary, neither...a person who I never trusted at all). I do have a photograph of: me/Andrew/Gary...at one of the family gathering's funeral; which, occasionally, I tend to take out to look at, again.
- I was meant to vote...; but, because they changed the voting system, recently...you have to bring ID...so, I didn't vote...fearing I didn't have the right sort of ID (no driving licence/passport)...I only got a 'birth certificate', instead; thus not having voted...did disturb me, somewhat...and, voting day was just yesterday; so, it was certainly playing on my mind.
- Another thing that might have affected my dreams...was I eat just before sleeping...; and, when you sleep on a full stomach...with 'undigested' food; then, that can lead to 'uncomfortable' sleep.
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Anyway, at the end of the day, I really don't know what that dream meant...if it's either meant to be a good/or, bad thing...; later on, during the day, though...I might try and look up the dream's meaning online.
-(I always had some serious doubts about 'fortune telling'...because, if you consult one place/person, it might say this/and, if you consult another place/person, they say that...; so, which of these is the 'right' prediction to believe in...?!)-
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Thinking about it...'nostalgia' plays a huge part in my life...; I suppose, in a way, it's how we both come to know, and, therefore, see ourselves as being, essentially...who we are related to...how we grew up/went to which schools...what food we ate/drank in the past...what country system we were born in...which, also, influences our 'feeling and thinking process'/-etc.
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- 12:00 NOON COOKED TUNA AND RICE
I made some 2 cups of brown rice(sprinkled with pickled onions/diced beetroot); which I eat with a tin of tuna chunks(salt/pepper)/together with 1 egg. It all tasted Very good, actually.
I can't believe just how quickly I finished eating the whole entire pot...; must have been really 'hungry', I guess.
Well, I didn't eat breakfast...; apart from tea/and, jam donought's.
I did also eat some fruit: 1 x diced apple/1 x banana/2 slices of grapefruit(Vitamin C).
But, that was about it.
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When I'm poor, I do NOT eat all that well...and, I have to deliberately try to keep my diet being as carefully well balanced as is possible; but, then, when I have money to spare...; man, I buy...
- 2 or 3 large sized pizza's...Vegetarian Hot/Sea Food/Donner Kebab
- Fish n Chips/with Steak & Kidney Pie/plus, large sausage in batter
- Chocolate sponge cakes/Chocolate Eclairs/Cream cakes...
- Sugar almonds/Belgian Chocolates/Haazen Daaz ice cream
- A whole red melon/mango's.
- etc.
I really do 'hate' it being poor; and, having to eat little else but...
- Baked beans and eggs/sometimes, I add in a tin of Franfurter sausages
- Loaf of brown bread(with butter/and, other spreads: Peanut butter/Nutella/Jam)
- etc
...living life poor is really kind of weird. I just have to treat it as if I were living a sort of special forces 'survivalist' sort of game...otherwise, I'm not sure if I could get through...?!
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- 13:00 WAS WATCHING A GAME OF PROFESSIONAL POKER BEING PLAYED ONLINE: POKERSTARSUK
- https://www.facebook.com/PokerStarsUK/videos/284152693939018
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- 14:00 DID SOME FACEBOOK IM/INSTANT MESSAGE CHATTING...INSIDE OF BOTH: THE ASPERGER'S ROOM/THE GAMBLING ROOM
As I usually tend to do of late...I used Facebook IM/Instant Message chat to enter 2 x different community rooms...
- ALS General Chat (Asperger's Life Support)
- Gambling addiction and recovery
...where I spoke to..and, with...a few people.
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- 15:00 JOINED IN WITH A GA/GAMBLER'S ANONYMOUS MEETING ONLINE (WHICH WAS BEING HELD IN AMERICA)
I was in a Facebook IM/Instant Message room, called:
- Gambling addiction and recovery
...when I saw an invite link, quite suddenly, appear...inviting the room visitors to attend an online chat meeting...which was being held in America; so, purely on a whim, I decided to join in.
The group based chat software used is called: Zoom. At first, I tried signing in from my Desktop computer...which has no mike/camcorder attached...; but, that communication method didn't work so well; therefore, I next decided to join in with the chat using my iPad Air 2, instead; and, everything worked fine.
I can't say I learned one hell of a lot inside there...; but, it certainly was interesting getting to see/talk to people -who speak English- on the other side of the world. Individual who wished to talk...were allowed to...including me, as well.
Finally, when the meeting was all over and done with...we all thanked everyone; and, then, left being in the Zoom software meeting.
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- 22:30 THOUGHT ABOUT GOING OUT TO BUY MYSELF SOME CHICKEN & FRIES...; BUT, LEFT IT FAR TOO 'LATE'
I was, seriously, thinking about going down to Tulse Hill...to go and buy myself some 'chicken and fries'; however, most unfortunately, even though I had gotten dressed...; with this or that distracting me...eventually, I found the time had run out...as the shop closes at 11 PM...; and, the current time, actually, said 10:55 PM; there's no way I can get down to reach Tulse Hill with less than 5 minutes left...?! Thus, I had to give up on that idea, completely...; who knows, maybe, when tomorrow comes.
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- 23:08 PLAYED WILLIAM HILL FREE GAMES/5 FREE SPINS (EMAIL)/WON: 10P!
I decided to check email...; and, in particular, searched for: WilliamHill...from the search results which came back...; I clicked on the most recent email which they sent me.
It said I was entitled to have 5 FREE spins...; so, I clicked there...
After taking the 5 FREE spins...I won just: £0.10p.
Nothing much further to say really...; other than, quite obviously, feeling somewhat disappointed; last time, I recall winning £3.00...which might buy me something -(that is, bearing in mind the minimum withdrawal is £5.00/so, you would need to keep on betting...and, winning more...before being allowed to withdraw any funds)-; but, £0.10p ain't going to buy me anything at all, I'm afraid.
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- 23:20 VISITED: FINDAJOB.GOV.UK WEB SITE...TO COMPLETE DOING DAILY JOB SEARCH
Visited...
https://findajob.gov.uk
...in order to do the usual daily job search online.
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- 23:30 VISITED MICROSOFT REWARDS WEB SITE: REWARDS.MICROSOFT.COM...IN ORDER TO ACCUMULATE SOME MORE POINTS...SO, I CAN GET FREE VOUCHERS TO USE INSIDE OF SHOPS
Visited...
- https://microsoft.rewards.com
...where I can play games/quizzes/view offers...in order to receive points...when one accumulates enough points...; then, one can use those points to obtain vouchers that can be used inside of shops.
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